I did not know my pain ailed you…

I did not know my pain ailed you,
Have I known better,
I would not have bled infront of you.
Have I realized the depth of my wounds,
I would not have portrayed all at once.
Have I ever known to be a better friend,
I would have protected you from my own venom.

But-
I did not know my pain ailed you.
I did not know my mere existence,
Would have priced yours.
Have I known my obliviousness would cause all this harm,
I would not have turn to your accord,
Let alone to embrace your company.

But-
I did not know my pain ailed you.
I did not think my ache had super powers,
I disregarded it as if it was nothing,
When it was more than something.
I would not dare to leave you exposed,
For any consequence that would follow
Because of my pain.
My long, dreary ache.
Which I wish to hide, now-
Which I wish to swallow,
Before causing any malady,
Any irreparable damage,
To those of which I love,
Or not, perhaps.
I wish not to see anyone-
Ailed by my sting,
Whether I think high,
Or low of them.
No one is to be on the receiver end,
For the next punch of my pain.
I, only I-
Would be acquainted,
And battle against it,
No matter what.
For my pain,
Would not cause you another pain,
Whatsoever,
Not anymore.